Now That’s Class
Popularity: 7% [?]
Popularity: 7% [?]
Okay, so I know I don’t attend a lot of University, in fact my attendance is shocking, but I do try. And it’s things like this that cause me to fail. Let me set the scene, from about two weeks ago…
I set off for Lincoln, from my home in Skegness (well, not actually in Skegness, thank god, but close enough) in plenty of time. And when I say plenty, I mean plenty! We’re talking three hours before the lecture starts, for a journey that, at most, takes an hour and half. And yet I miss the lecture. Completely. By, like, an hour. Woop.
Why? Just look at the freaking pictures! Some piddly little accident between a car and a lorry. In other words, some fucking idiot pulled out in front of something because he couldn’t see. And, and this is pure conjecture, I would be willing to bet they couldn’t see on this wonderful sunny day, because they were not wearing sunglasses. Thus, they deserve everything they got. And, seen as no one was hurt (essentially) I think the driver should be shot. Or at least given three points and a 60GBP fine.
After all, you get fined for not wearing a seatbelt, what the fuck for?? And don’t go quoting ‘the one not wearing the seatbelt did the damage‘ shit at me, I don’t give a fuck. If you’re driving, you tell people what to do, it’s your responsibility. If you don’t mind, or more importantly, if you’re on your own, why are you being told what to do in your car?? This is complete bollocks, and is only exacerbated by the fact there is no punishment for the fucking morons who refuse to wear sunglasses when driving in bright conditions. This is completely unacceptable behaviour, and I absolutely believe it causes major accidents. And the culprits? The brain dead trash who you see peering underneath the sunvisor, driving through a small letterbox sized gap, even then still unable to see properly. Mirrors? Pah, who needs mirrors! Fuckers.
Popularity: 13% [?]
Holy crap. Why? What a wierdo. Oh, and I didn’t just take these, these were taken at the beginning of November! People like these are making the world worse, little by little, and eventually the whole galaxy will implode on itself and explode right into these people’s front room. Hopefully.
Oh, and although it looks like I just stuck my camera out of the window as I drove past, I really didn’t… I had to stop. However, if I had my dream camera, I guess I would have done that. Or been in the back of a Range Rover laying down, with a telephoto lens, and James at the wheel… hmmmm, one day.
Popularity: 12% [?]
Yes, driving to work this weekend, little did I know I was about to stumble upon some artistic genius in the middle of a neighbouring field. But yes, it was my lucky day, as I rounded the corner and was introduced to the following beautiful sight. Amazing isn’t it? The twisted metal, the charred remains of anything not tough enough to withstand a few thousand degrees. Truly a magnificent act, and one the should not go without praise. So here’s to you, mysterious artist, and all your future work!
Interestingly, from this angle it looks almost (discounting the wheel) like a 911 of some description. Hmm. Odd that. Wonder what it’s story is? Ahhh, guess we’ll never know. Let’s face it, the Police aren’t going to manage are they…
Popularity: 9% [?]
Yes, alright, I added that last part, but only because you can’t get number plates that long. That would be frikkin’ awesome though. Check it out:
Obviously I didn’t blur out this plate… so don’t go round this guys house and steal his car or anything, because I’ll be, like, a tiny, tiny bit responsible.
Popularity: 8% [?]
Woo, couple weeks ago got my new brake pads fitted. And boy, can I tell the difference. Now, around two thousand miles later, they are nicely bedded in and they have some serious stopping power. Just a little warning to those tail gating bastards…
As if it’s not obvious, the new one is on the left, and the one on the right has just been removed.
Popularity: 7% [?]
Well, I think this is better illustrated with a photograph, deliciously enough taken with my new phone…
Yeh, well, I was very drunk and then when the wrong people try and talk to me, who have been causing me a lot of problems for a long time, I flip. Sorry, that’s just me. Cut my hand up pretty bad… good times. Sigh.
Popularity: 8% [?]
Seriously, I think it might be. I didn’t even think this was a legal practice! You could hold a centurion in this place, and I’m sure they would be cool with it. Wow. I mean, just… wow.
Popularity: 40% [?]
Here we take a glimpse of the Download nightlife. Yes, it was as brutal as the mosh pits, and Lenny was surely as drunk as ever. What a drunken bastard. I don’t think I ever saw him without a can in his hand, and more than likely several more concealed about his person. This also had the pleasing effect of making him walk rather oddly, whilst trying to sneak around security etc. Sorry, but it just looked like he’d pissed himself.
Oh and if you’re wondering who it is stamping on his head? Wel I’m afraid if I told you I’d have to kill you…. Oh go on then, it was James.
Popularity: 44% [?]
Wow. Just downloaded every photograph from my phone and rediscovered a bunch of great photographs from Download Festival 2007. So over the coming few days I will be providing the best ones here for your enjoyment, with a little background of course. First up we have our very own version of rock hands, made from the slowly melting remains of a plastic fork. Genius, I think you’ll agree…
[Read more →]
Popularity: 40% [?]
Yes, that’s correct this was a very limited run of just one vehicle, kitted out with the Ascot Cock refinements. Namely an Animal teddy and a resealable bag of Polos. Fantastic! And totally unique.
Oh, and I apologise for the mis-alignment, we were kind of rushed when we were doing this…
Popularity: 48% [?]
Yes, those dastardly peoples are up to it again, with their parking anywhere and everywhere, this time, apparently, to pick up something from Argos… Now I’m no expert, but shouldn’t the lights be on if they’re in the middle of an Emergency Shopping Venture? (us in the know call them ESVs…)
Popularity: 42% [?]
And that purpose is death. Clearly the owner of this wonderful automobile has given up and decided to kill himself rather than live any longer with the monstrosity sitting on his drive. Fortunately they were able to remove the offending vehicle before it caused mass suicide on the street. I was able to take this photo only looking away and quickly pressing the shutter release, so I apologise for the blurring and distance…
Don’t stare for too long or your eyeballs may melt. Causing a mess.
Popularity: 42% [?]
Wow, this is truly some of the best parking I have seen in recent times. This guy clearly is so ‘elite’ that he doesn’t need to stay within the lines of the road. Oh no, he parks where ever the cars takes him. If that happens to be at a jaunty angle then so be it, he’s too cool to care. What a dude!
Look, he’s even too cool to close his doors properly. Hmmm, thinking about it I should probably have seen if the car was unlocked… you know, just to make sure nothing could be stolen.
Popularity: 38% [?]